This is the finale. The Big Hoorah! I’d like to start off by saying what a great experience this project has been. I not only got the chance to learn about something I feel closely related to, but I also got to learn things about myself. Things such as, I suck at time management. But other things like, living each day like it is a gift and enjoying the time we have here. I am disappointed in myself to say the least about where my project finished. I was given an opportunity to do something important to not just me, but people all over, and I blew it. Coming out of it I am proud that I chose something tough, and weirdly enough, I am content with failing. If I did not fail, I would’ve learned nothing.
But overall, looking at twenty time as a whole, I did not like the project. If I could redo it I would’ve chosen a project that I could’ve done all in class instead of having to worry about it on my own time. For sophomores in high school, were juggling a lot on our plate (some more than others). We have 7 classes to study for, sports after school, we like to spend time with family and friends, and most importantly were teenagers who sometimes just want to sleep. Speaking for myself, this project caused a lot of unnecessary and unwanted stress. Anxiety took over and made me less motivated each week to work on it. Yes I will admit to wasting some time that could have been used for working on my project, but I am also a student athlete that is swimming in a pool of stress right now. The last thing I need is a time consuming project raining over me. I like the idea of the project but I think it would better fit a class of seniors who have already decided where they’re going to college and are thinking about careers. I don’t think this project is for sophomores who have no idea what their future holds.
I also did not like the blog posts. To me they were a waste of time because it felt as if nobody was reading them but myself. When other people aren’t showing interest in your project it slows you down, brings down the confidence you started with, and lessens your motivation to keep going. I originally planned to host a volleyball tournament to raise money for cancer, but because of the little interest people seemed to have in it, even my teacher, I gave up on it. I wish I would’ve hosted the tournament but I started growing a fear that people wouldn’t show up and I would raise no money for these families.
At the beginning of this project I was extremely excited to be working on something that has personally affected me, but now that I’m at the finish line I feel like a failure. And not in a good way, not in the way we were supposed to fail. I feel like I have let people down and I am disappointed in myself because of that. I always have people telling me that I can’t do something and I usually end up proving them wrong, but not this time. When I first started playing volleyball, they told me I’d never make a national team, now I play for one of top 5 teams in the country. They told me playing in college was just a dream, but it is all becoming a reality. But now because of this project, I feel like I have given in to my reputation, I’ve caved to the people telling me I can’t. And that is not okay. I wish I could go back to square one, but now it is over and I have the chance to use what I have learned in order to make sure this doesn’t happen again. I am just praying and hoping that my speech doesn’t end up like my project, a fail. For those that have been reading my posts, thank you for showing interest and I apologize for letting you down.